What is going on in HER mind?

[Allmylife4her]

You asked for communication and got a punishment...the lifeblood of any relationship is honesty and communication.

I totally agree. I sought clarification of our situation from her and learned she was happy, she was also happy to push out my release date 3 months (which she knew would drive me crazy). By asking her about our situation she did have the chance to modify things if she wanted too, or even pull the plug (so to speak) and I'm happy with her decision to extend my chastity. I think a bigger issue would be if the chastised was too worried of asking his KH a question in fear of her reply, then there would be an underlying problem of expectation on both parts and the rules of the games should be changed.

[poor]

I asked Chatelaine, as she once again prosecuted her right to 'have it her way', how it felt to be the one to always decide if, when and how either of us would have sexual satisfaction.

She replied "Liberating. Now, let's not waste your lips with any more talking".

[poor]

Yep. According to a lesbian that I work with it's called 'The 3 point turn-on; lips,nips and clit'. She sites (not doing) it as one of the reasons that she is a far better lover of women than any of us blokes will ever be.

[Locked by LRC]

When I asked LRC about this in the past her explanation was this.

Men's orgasms are physical. That's it, nothing more.

A woman's orgasm can be mental and/or physical. She said women could write a book on the different ways they can achieve sexual satisfaction. One of her case-in-points. She can have an orgasm by watching me masturbate while she controls the tempo. At my orgasm she says she will experience one also.
I have watched LRC masturbate and it gets me very excited, but I could never orgasm from just watching.

[deepj15]

What is going on in my mind? I am female and my feeling on all of this is that for years I have given and given and now I am looking forward to receiving more than giving. As a caretaker it is really hard to put myself first and do believe that this is a good way to work on learning that lesson.

My husband did suggest all this and I agreed, he seems so much happier and content now that I am "officially" in charge.. I have always been in charge, he just did not fully accept this fact until a few months ago.

He has always said, "I am the king of my castle." To which I have always responded, "Yes you are the king of your castle, but you are like the Emperor of Japan - only a figurehead - you have no real power." This seems to be true now more than ever.

[Allmylife4her]

What is going on in my mind? I am female and my feeling on all of this is that for years I have given and given and now I am looking forward to receiving more than giving. As a caretaker it is really hard to put myself first and do believe that this is a good way to work on learning that lesson.

My husband did suggest all this and I agreed, he seems so much happier and content now that I am "officially" in charge.. I have always been in charge, he just did not fully accept this fact until a few months ago.

He has always said, "I am the king of my castle." To which I have always responded, "Yes you are the king of your castle, but you are like the Emperor of Japan - only a figurehead - you have no real power." This seems to be true now more than ever.

It appears you are feeling liberated.

[UnderHerThumb]

I think that perhaps some of the men here are overestimating how important PIV may be to their significant others. Additionally, as some have stated, their wives/girlfriends may have been having sex simply because they knew that's what their partners wanted.

My wife/KH gets home at around 8:00 in the evening. I'm in my collar in the outfit of her choice, dinner is on the table waiting for her and I take care of the dishes and run a bath for her. Nothing I've done in the past 8 years of our being together has gotten her more mentally and physically aroused than this type of play/lifestyle. Even she is amazed/surprised and will, on occasion, remove her panties and take my fingers, or if I'm extremely luck, my face and place it between her thighs in order to "show me" how wet and aroused she is.

I think she would be the first to admit that she could go the rest of her life without PIV sex. Oral with fingers and/or toys coupled with the knowledge that she has control of my pleasure and my total devotion to her is the ultimate turn on. On the rare occasions where she actually wants to fuck, I'm all for it, but I'm very happy with the current status quo.

I do think that within the subset of men on this forum however, things may be a bit skewed towards men who enjoy orally pleasing women more than they enjoy penetration. It might just be my submissive nature coming out, but I have always felt much more confident using my tongue than my cock. I'm "average" [6"], but the majority of women I've been with in my life have always seemed to enjoy being pleasured orally more than they enjoyed fucking. I realize that this certainly doesn't apply to all women, as I've known plenty that will make a comment like "forget the tongue, I just want cock". Of course, they usually seem to be referring to cocks larger than 6", but that's an entirely different topic.

If you're in a domme/sub type lifestyle as we are, incorporating chastity devices seems like a very logical next step to consider. We've been at it for about 2-3 months and haven't been focusing as much on how long I actually keep the device on, but more on her controlling my orgasms. I've worn the CB6000 for as long as 11 days straight and then I might go 2 or 3 days without it. I don't even think about masturbating while I'm not wearing it as I know this would go against the "rules" we have set for ourselves. I find it extremely comfortable, but noticeable in a sort of "Hey, I'm gonna remind you that you're wearing something down there every now and then" sort of way....which to me, is incredibly erotic. It motivates me throughout my day at work and even more so once I am home.

Every now and then I will ask my wife/Mistress if she is in need of "big cock" as she gives me everything I could ever ask for as a slave/submissive male and I always want to return the favor. She is an incredibly honest woman and we have very open and honest conversations about everything. I truly believe that if it was something she wanted or craved, she would tell me.

As a few have mentioned and many women's magazines/books discuss, women are happiest when then feel secure, loved, listened to and desired. Men seem to be happiest when they are looking at porn with their cocks inside a blonde with big tits. I much prefer the first option.

Robert

[finallyhappy]

Frankly although many women are not into piv as much as others, it seems that your and many others opinions are more due to your (collective) submissive natures. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Male chastity is perfect for people that want to lead submissive lifestyles.

So I will compromise with you. This weekend if my gf wants me to have an orgasm, I'll give that redhead's (not blonde) incredible rack a pearl necklace instead of piv. No porn required.

[TwistedMister]

Mrs. Twisted greatly enjoys PIV (preferably immediately after tongue, and with tongue again immediately after that), so much so that she sometimes says that she isn't getting enough, which leaves her with a bit of a conundrum since she also greatly enjoys the benefits of keeping me locked up.

[finallyhappy]

Mission accomplished. It was a very nice weekend indeed.