You won't believe what happened last night

[grubber]

Last night along with this past week was remarkable.

For you new guys thinking about chastity along with the wankers out there, buckle your seat belts. Have I got a story for you.

Absolutely nothing happened sexually and it was great. Really great. That's right, nothing, and I still love my wife dearly and can't get enough of her. We all love to talk about the hot times we have, but in reality, life still happens. My wife has been suffering from back pain and I have been buried with my work.

I just wanted to let people know that chastity isn't always about getting off or teased 24/7. It's more about the relationship between two people and how chastity can enhance it. Let's face it. Nobody, let alone a couple, can be on 24/7. Reality has shown that there are other things in life that are far more important at different times.

My KH wife is a beautiful woman that loves me as dearly as I love her and is a very, very good KH, but it seems that many either entering or living the lifestyle expect that things are going to be blazing hot all the time which isn't ever going to be the case. Is chastity fun? Sure. I am horny everyday and my KH wife probably surpasses a lot of other KH's. Some days more than others, but the reality is that I love chastity because I can be there for here in hot times and slow times and she with me and our love just keeps on growing.

The guys here that have been long term understand. Just strapping a cage on your dick and expecting your KH to suddenly become a teasing sex machine is fantasy at best. Although the term is used far too often, it's about the journey. We wouldn't live our lives any other way anymore. Chastity is truly remarkable done right and I couldn't have a better partner that's doing it right as far as I am concerned.

[XKB8R]

Great post.

(I wish there was a "thumbs up" smiley.)

[TwistedMister]

Yep, good post. I would have to add, though, that it (chastity) causes some things to be sexualized that otherwise might not be thought of as sexual. As a 'fer instance'- being asked/told to get her a drink when she comes home after a long day causes stirrings of arousal. Being asked to rub her feet causes an even stronger reaction, swelling and filling the cage completely as I touch and stroke and rub and massage them and make her feel better- even though I know that my cock is [probably] not going to get any direct attention [from her] it still reacts as though it is...well, it *will*, just at some amorphous time in the future instead of immediately.

These things become a 'tease' even though she may not feel (or even realize) that she is doing any teasing at all...and even more exciting when she *does* realize that she is doing it and lets you *know* that *she* knows exactly what she is doing to you...

[grubber]

TwistedMister: You are absolutely right. I overlooked mentioning those things and glad you did.

Everything she does in hot times and slow times arouses me whether she realizes it or not. Giving her lower back massages and leg stretches to help ease her back pain this past week got me rock hard in my cage. Heck, just doing anything for her or with her is arousing.

It doesn't always have to be hot times for chastity to be great. The simple vanilla things have become so good now that the hot times are super hot WHEN they happen.

[TwistedMister]

It doesn't always have to be hot times for chastity to be great. The simple vanilla things have become so good now that the hot times are super hot WHEN they happen.

And the more women realize this, the more men will be locked up. It is often said that men are controlled by their dicks, thinking with the 'little head' instead of the big one...control his dick and you control *him*...and some of them *like* it.

I think that Mrs. Twisted has been coming to realize this. Sure she likes the 'hot times' too, and they are 'hotter' and happen more often when she has me locked, but I think that she has come to the conclusion that, in general, she enjoys knowing that she has control of my cock and the subtle (and sometimes not so subtle) shift in attitude and behavior that comes with it. Lately, she has been mentioning more and more often about needing to get me a new [steel] cage that she won't have to worry will split and injure me (CB3000 split at the seam and caused a nasty little wound)...and something that she said a while ago ("Can you imagine being still locked up in this thing when you're eighty...?") gives me the impression that she might like to make it permanent.

I know that some folks say that you should treat your wife (GF/SO) in a particular manner without needing to be 'locked-up' to do it, but I think that the simple fact is that some of us can turn into knuckle-dragging Neanderthals when the stress/drudgery of 'ordinary' life overshadows everything else and the 'little things' get neglected...and a corresponding simple fact is, that having one's cock locked in a cage with her holding the Key is a powerful reminder not to let things slide.

"Well, you shouldn't have to have your dick locked in a cage to..." Bullshit. We use plenty of other tricks and 'devices' to help us remember other things- lists, notes, a sticker on the windshield for the next oil change, etc. -important things that could cause serious problems if we were to forget and let them slide, this is no different...well, it's a little different- it's a little kinky (or a lot, depending on what you're into) -but it's still the same thing. And it can be a hell of a lot of fun for both. Sure, it's an 'artificial' reminder, but why should there be anything 'wrong' with that? The answer is that there *isn't* anything wrong with it. If both get something they want out of it, and it makes their lives better, then by jimminy, go for it...ah, shit, has anybody seen my soapbox? Oh, wait, I think I'm standing on it...

Oops, that was just supposed to be a simple acknowledgment, not a rant, I'll step down now.

[LOCKED HUSBAND]

Wife has my soap box Twisted mister so I'll just say I agree with both of you.

[maxANDsue]

I enjoy the teasing and it is what gets me through each week. After 40+ years of marriage, my wife can bring me within one stroke of an orgasm and then stop and laugh. Even when I try not to give any outward signs of an impending orgasm, she knows just by holding my erection. She has 40+ years of experience with me.

I could not make it long term without the teasing. To me, that is my sex. It is what I look forward to every three days. I have always preferred foreplay to an orgasm so teasing is what I enjoy the most about chastity. The best part is that since my wife leans more towards sex with women, she makes very little demands on me to sexually please her so the teasing sessions are mostly focused just on me.

[locked4her55]

my wife can bring me within one stroke of an orgasm and then stop and laugh. Even when I try not to give any outward signs of an impending orgasm,

You are a lucky man. Twenty four years with my wife and it's not that easy for her.

[robtandhiswife]

No sex or sexual release is a feeling i know well. In the very early days my sweetie was somewhat suspect of why in the world i would want that. The simple aspect of getting her off and then cuddling after with no expectation of anything in return is awesome. She rarely asks if i need it even.

[sherulestherooster]

Absolutely nothing happened sexually and it was great. Really great. That's right, nothing, and I still love my wife dearly and can't get enough of her. We all love to talk about the hot times we have, but in reality, life still happens. My wife has been suffering from back pain and I have been buried with my work.

I just wanted to let people know that chastity isn't always about getting off or teased 24/7. It's more about the relationship between two people and how chastity can enhance it. Let's face it. Nobody, let alone a couple, can be on 24/7. Reality has shown that there are other things in life that are far more important at different times.

We had a very similar experience happen recently. My wife was on her period and we didn't play until the very end. No real teasing, only subtle acknowledgement that she enjoyed the fact that my orgasm was under her control and it wasn't time for release yet.

At the risk of sounding too gushy for a male, our relationship has never been better. Is it because she denies my orgasms? To some extent, yes. I do think I act more lovingly towards her when she teases and denies me, what I describe as "courtship behavior". Is that solely it? I don't think so. Her indulging me in my kinks, trying this femdom stuff out, is certainly pleasurable to me (and I believe her as well), but honestly, it makes me feel understood and accepted. I don't know why I'm wired to be sexually submissive, but I am and it feels very liberating to me to have my partner accept it and enjoy it. It's been quite a journey, sometimes too slow for me, but that's the nature of this.

It feels like we are lovesick teenagers again. Our kids get grossed out by how affectionate we are. My wife will complain that it has been too long since we've had a date night. She will half-jokingly "complain" that she likes my cuddles in the morning so much but it makes her late to work. Our relationship seems awesome right now.

But, like the OP, it isn't 100% about sex. In the past month, my wife came 10 times to my 1. That isn't humping like rabbit sex. But it is about what we can handle with our crazy lifestyle right now. Cannot wait until we are empty nesters, though!