How do you guys deal with no orgasms?

[Blaeu]

My wife and I usually use our CB6000s as a "sex toy" and engage in short term chastity. More recently, she has been leaving me locked up for longer and longer. As of now, I haven't had an orgasm in over a week, which I know is chump change to most of you. However, I find myself using my mouth, fingers, and sex toys to please my wife everyday, sometimes two or three times. She also loves to tease me all day long.

In general, I have no problems with this. In fact, its quite fun. However, it leaves me feeling more horny and wanting than I know what to do with.

Two issues that I'm hoping to get some feedback on.

1. When she's done, she will often go about doing whatever she wants to do. Eat, watch TV, play video game, etc. I'm left incredibly horny with no way of release, and I often feel very frustrated at this. Even though I WANT this, I dislike it. Any tips are dealing with this? Either physically or mentally.

2. At night, I find it hard to relax enough to sleep. Being this horny is like a stimulant. I feel like I need less to eat and that I have more energy. I cannot help but think of sex at night and this, along with what I previously said, makes it hard to fall asleep. Without going into too much detail, any tips here?

[Locked by LRC]

Maybe what you describe is the reason so many entering chastity start to do more things around the house. Cooking, dishes, laundry, child care, etc. They find a new feeling of extra energy.

As to the feeling of being horny, welcome to the club. To me, this is one of the things I like. When I first started chastity, the horney/frustrated feeling was also bad, but I got used to it. I can't say how long it took but I'm to the point that I miss that feeling when it's not there. When LRC will go a week or two and not even touch the cage, I feel worse than when she teases me everyday for a week. I'm sure this isn't the answer you want to hear but that's the way it is for me.

[Finn]

Mentally, I try and focus on "sharing" the orgasms I give. I first read bout this with regard to Tantric and I do get some relief from given orgasms. Mentally I try and tell myself that orgasms are something I give and no-longer have myself. Part of the whole idea is to be able to perform sexually when needed (but without cumming), so in that sense, being easily aroused is part of my lot in life with this. Of course, you want a constant state of fun sex stuff to do, but it doesnt happen in real life. In Tantric, one is supposed to take the energy from refraining from ejaculation and meditate to move it to a different chakra or some such thing.

[finallyhappy]

I'd say remember that first and foremost this is a game. I'll also venture to say that in all likelyhood you made up the rules and she us only playing by your rules, she is just running with them and having fun.

That frustration that you are feeling is such a sexual high. It is exactly what you are seeking. Mentally relax and enjoy it. I'd also say that right about now you are having more sex than.previously too. Relax and enjoy that as well.

As far as her going about her business that's great. If you are really that frustrated, then she should be laying there cuddling and teasing that much unless you enjoy it.

Now if you are serious about the lockups being too long then you need to have a chat about that. But you better be more than 100% certain about it because you run the risk of lessening her dedication to it and the only thing you cannot do is keep flip-flopping on her.

Bottom line, relax. Give it time. Just enjoy the fun.

[Chuck]

After doing this for over a year I'd rather not have the "O". I hate the down time and love being horny all the time. I love always being "at the ready". There are times the frustration drives me nuts but then I get home to her and am glad I get to touch her, massage her and offer her pleasure. When we play it's always awesome and leaves me dripping with desire. So, I guess I deal with it by reveling in the erotic tension.

[Finn]

I agree with Chuck. Once you really feel the need to quit orgasms, and commit to it, it''s what you prefer. I did 3 and a bit months of no O back in the summer and then tried a period of cumming once a week. I have to admit that I had some awesome orgasms, by way of my girls mouth. The thing with me is that often, the bigger the O, the bigger the drop afterwards. I had one really huge one, after a long period of chastity and abstinence. A really mind blowing, knee bucking, shooting my soul down her throat orgasm. I realized though that my desire was for my cock to not be about my own pleasure and getting off. I talked to my wife and my girl about me giving up masturbation and orgasms and we all agreed that it was going to benefit my wife and I, and give my girl a task in making sure I stick to it. It is really hard at times. It's especially hard when one of my top masturbation fantasies is the idea of never orgasming again...go figure!

[male_lockdenied]

I am single and unattached, so I'm not doing this for anybody but myself, and my last orgasm was just shy of midnight that started 01 October, then I locked it up at 9 that morning, and have been locked since then, and considering that I used to masturbate to orgasm 10 to 12 times a week, the tension and frustration seems like its about to drive me right up the wall and over the edge and around the bend.... OY.

[biggar]

For myself, given my age, it has become much easier over the years. If we had started this say in my 20's it would have been a lot harder to endure! Even when we started it was harder for say the first week or so, but I found that after the initial week of denial then the time after that didn't really make much difference at all. Now 8 weeks is no problem and I could probably go much longer! It's my Wife/KH that misses the sex. And I do plenty of adult surfing to keep teased and on edge too! But after the lockup the allowed orgasm seems so much more intense and appreciated!

[danj]

We don't do super long denials, maxing out at about 3 weeks. But I get my relief in the joy of intimacy with my wife and giving her pleasure. I guess I get into a "zone" where I have intense mental pleasure by making her cum. While I will still feel very aroused after making her cum, I will often feel a nice sense of fulfillment while we both relax after her orgasm. It is usually a little easier for me if I was kept in the device, too.

[kept4her]

I think for each and everyone of us it is different how we deal and how we find our way with not having a orgasm. Going from a 2-3 time a day easy prior to July of this year to now going 30 days between and possibly more, I have found a complete different prospective.

At first I was just like you, couldn't sleep, was horny all the time, just a smell of my wife would cause me to fight my cage. Then I found almost a self pleasure when I was able to bring my wife to a orgasm. I started listening to her more, hear breathing, I started watching her body movements more and finding myself enjoying the fact that she was having a orgasm by my work. This almost changed the whole thought to me. Now I almost need to bring my wife to orgasm once a week for me to feel good about my devotion to her.

Secondly I find that my excitement still comes and goes at night but that is a pleasure I have knowing she is sleeping beside me and I have got use to going to sleep thinking of her and being excited.

For me, it just took time. Things changed in a good way I feel to a greater devotion to my wife and my need for being in chastity. I know that before I never had these feelings....