In a nutshell my Wife is almost insufferably nice
![Very Happy :D](./images/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif)
The idea of denying me is giving her problems, even though I have asked her to limit and control my orgasms. We made love last night and I was relieved to be able to concentrate on her pleasure enough that she came before I did, and I was able to hold off altogether. She was disappointed that I had not also orgasmed even though it is only a week since my last.
The point is one of my goals in this arrangement of ours is that I want my orgasms to be special, memorable, earned. In my own head one week doesn't fulfil any of those criteria. The orgasm would have been 'nice' but not memorable. Although in the week I did give my Wife three orgasms I still do not think I deserved one of my own.
My Wife told me that she does not like using me for her own pleasure. A programmed by culture feeling perhaps? Success is recorded with an orgasm and if either of us don't cum that makes us a failure?
But I have a need for her to control my orgasms, to not worry about my pleasure. I have explained before how much I enjoy her orgasms, especially when I have not had one for about three weeks or more. So being made to orgasm last night would have actually been a punishment.
I have asked her to deny me until my birthday in May. This might be a bit extreme but I really want to demonstrate to her what actually happens to me over such an extended period. Heck, I want to find out what it is like myself. It represents just over double my current 'record' of denial of just under six weeks.
I hope she agrees, but also I hope this does not mean she will deny herself. She can use me as much as she wants to.