Inspired by 50 Shades of Grey

[Intense_Restraint]

I haven't read the book or watched the movie, 50 Shades of Grey, but I read some reviews. I was intrigued by the part of the story in which the couple agrees to a written contract governing their behavior. I decided to propose a three-week contract to my wife, which covered a chastity period and certain other relationship-related activities. The idea is that the first contract may be followed by other contracts, which could involve additional negotiation on details of the relationship.

What I think may be beneficial about this activity is that it forces us to talk even more openly than usual about what we want from the relationship. Comments, anyone?

[slave d]

i think the great thing about all these so-called "kinks" is the fact that they're not possible without opening up the lines of communication first and therein lies the whole secret of why they improve relationships. i certainly know that MsM and i communicate much more than W/we ever did before and i tell Her things i would never have in the past. W/we started the chastity part of our lives after 39 years of marriage with a written contract as a start point and have gone from strength to strength since, a year on and i write Her a weekly "report" and W/we have just added a "sissy task list" to the original contract outlining my domestic duties (my "uniform" arrived in today's post). So, in answer to your question i would definitely say that communication, not necessarily talking, has to open up in these situations or they fail to grow. W/we've been married over 40 years now and have never been closer or communicating better !!

d

[Len51]

I feel that I have had a great sex life over the last 50 years because I will tell my partners exactly what I like and coax them into telling me what they like. If they are shy about their kinks/fetishes, then I would tell them about my most weird/disgusting/embarrassing fetishes to make theirs seem tame by comparison. However, contracts never worked out for my wife, girlfriend and me. It seems that females are not big into making contracts which is why they mostly read like a list of things that the guy wants done to him. At least mine and most of the ones I have read online, do.

Our little triad communicated about our sexual desires on a daily basis. No one wanted to be confined to a written list of things they were supposed to do. We just told each other what we wanted to do in bed before we got into bed. Could be BDSM one night, taking turns directing the other two in a sex scene, water sports or any of many fetishes we were engaged in. Hard to predict what any of us would want and when. So, contracts never worked out for us although I have written a few. Just writing them was sexually stimulating though. If I try to make a rule now, my wife will say that one rule is too many rules. We do have one rule that works for any type of fetish and sexual situation. My wife makes the rules and can change them anytime she wants to.

Whether communicating on a daily basis of putting things in writing, if that is easier, telling your sex partner(s) what you like or want done that day is the key to a great sex life. Sometimes I was surprised by what my two ladies were willing to do. I would have never experienced many things if I had not brought them up.