"Coming out" in the open

[Herchaste]

Many women use sex to control men, maybe we should just accept the obvious, change the paradigm. What do you think if male chastity using a device was openly accepted in society and if the majority of men where in chastity. And women with men in chastity regularly talked about it openly and compared how their men were attending to them (more than they do already). What would it be like walking through the gym locker room and not having to hide our cage? Would you go along with this? Do you think I should place this thought in the Fiction forum?

[nebman]

What is normal is relative. The current Target ad for Valentine's day includes pictures of a condom box, KY lube, and a note that all condoms, lubricants and devices - vibrators - are 10% off. That never would have happened when I was a kid in the 1970's.

The Victorian era had a few half harted attempts at male chastity devices to prevent masturbation.

Could things have developed, or could they develop, that beyond puberty or some defined age that all males are either customarily or legally required to be fitted with secure devices? That another party is assigned as key holder? Could marriage vows include a one time showing of the male's genitals as they are being locked away in public? It's been said by many that nice custom devices are like jewelry. While some might argue rights violations, its a reality that a lot of men use their cocks irresponsibly in the opinions of many and customs can change.

Twenty years ago an affordable chastity device basically didn't exist. Now, you can buy them along with virtually any sex toy on Amazon. I was looking at sex toys on the CVS pharmacy website, and there were a number of cock rings - from a mainstream drugstore chain.

The idea that chastity devices could eventually, even soon, be among the "devices" on the store shelf at Target isn't at all far fetched.

The open discussion part by women, as you noted, wouldn't be much different from now. For a lot of people, their sex lives are quite private, and the idea of common discussion is quite different from common wearing of something on part of your body. Some women, especially close friends behind a few glasses of wine, probably share at lot. The average lunch at Olive Garden is not likely to lead to that kind of discussion.

[Len51]

Chastity is a fetish with a very small following. When you hang out on chastity forums it tends to feel like a lot more guys are doing it than actually are. Sexual acceptance is slowly changing over the years. My wife still will not tell anyone she is bisexual because her friends are very religious and would not accept that. I would think open marriages have a much better chance of going mainstream. I think in the near future we will see short term marriage licenses that can be renewed every few years. Divorce statistics tend to prove that at least half of married people are not cut out for a lifelong commitment. Short term marriages seem to be a viable alternative to nasty divorces and marital infidelity.

FYI, I have found some online pharmacies that list chastity devices as masturbation control devices. I see Trojan condom, lube and vibrators advertised on some cable channels. I remember when you could not see a woman wearing a bra in a bra commercial and yet, in Italy they show full nudity in the shower when advertising a new soap. Heck they even have game shows where contestants lose items of clothes when thy get a question wrong. In some countries I have see woman try to figure out which man is their husband by being blindfolded and touch several men's penises. The US moves slowly.

[nebman]

Chastity is a fetish with a very small following. When you hang out on chastity forums it tends to feel like a lot more guys are doing it than actually are.

I can't make any strong argument that male chastity is taking the world by storm - realistically, I just don't know. And, I'm not sure that it's a fetish for everyone that buys a device. Lot's of people experiment with a little whatever in the bedroom. I've sucked my wife's toes maybe 3 times in 20 years. I get tied down maybe 4 times a year. I'm poorly qualified as a foot fetishist and my total time in bondage does not likely exceed 3 hours a year.

The prevalence of hundreds of styles of chastity devices sold on popular mainstream websites, sex websites and in thousands of adult stores, tells me that a lot of people have at least dabbled in male chastity devices, and many more are likely to try over the next several years. I've seen a few claims that some sex websites find chastity devices to be among their top selling items. "The Gates of Hell" type toys have been around for a very long time and I used to think they looked kind of cool before I realized I could buy what we now call male chastity devices.

[wishful4]

I don't know that I would agree that male chastity has a small following. From what I have read, male chastity devices are the second most popular sex toys sold next to vibrators/dildos. Don't recall where I read or heard that so I can't substantiate it but I would not be surprised if it were true.

[MrCage]

For quite awhile I have thought that all men in a relationship should be caged. It does a lot for the relationship. The bond between mates becomes stronger and more intimate. Chastity has been a very interesting lifestyle to adopt. If it becomes a topic or scene in a movie or in the media, you can get a significant surge will occur.

[Herchaste]

The bond and intimacy that ensues when my wife is in control of my orgasm is intoxicating and my desire for her is insatiable. I love to see her grow with confidence. I am looking forward for her to take me to places I never thought I'd go.

[TwistedMister]

Divorce statistics tend to prove that at least half of married people are not cut out for a lifelong commitment.

This statement is not accurate. The statistics are skewed by people who repeatedly get married and divorced.

[gilesenglish]

Oddly, I blogged about this a short while ago!

I strongly suspect that male chastity will become mainstream, but only once a chastity device is no longer regarded as a kinky think and is just a sex toy.

If it can make that transition, then here's what I think will happen:

Male chastity is going to become a youth thing in subcultures where men are encouraged to be sensitive, meaning primarily Geek, Goth and intellectual communities. Here's why:

Male chastity is already an acceptable option for younger men in the gay community -- we seem to get a lot of young gay wearers on the Reddit chastity forums -- presumably because it fits with the whole boi vibe. Fashions tend to cross over from the gay community. Add to that the mainstreaming of male chastity (above) and straight young people will soon be as aware of chastity devices as they are of vibrators and cock rings. Why, however, would they embrace it?

Put bluntly, I think communities of young people will adopt male chastity primarily because of the ambivalence of young women and the poor negotiating position of young men when it comes to sex.

[Tame Lion]

This discussion in one form or another crops up from time to time within any fetish group. The simple fact is that enforced chastity is something we enjoy. It doesn't represent a cure for social ills. It won't cure any diseases. I suppose it's natural to rationalize what we do by thinking that if everyone knew about it, they would want it too. Be real.

Even if the majority of people got sprayed with something from another planet and felt the need for enforced male chastity, it still wouldn't be out in the open. Do you discuss every intimate thing you do with strangers or even friends?