What is your earliest memory of being kinky?

[Subhubby1968]

I think my earliest was the time I tried masturbating while wearing a pair of my moms underwear as a teen.

[Oldtimer]

I remember thinking in the womb that it would be very kinky to come out of a vagina instead of entering it.

[Finn]

Another thing I didn't think to mention is that some of my kink awakening came when seeing my first porn, back in the 80's. You'd see the couple going at it, and the woman is loving the sex, but then, the guy cums and she's left hanging. Usually the woman didn't orgasm before the guy. I remember becoming aroused at the thought of the roles being reversed, with the woman orgasming and the guy being left high and dry. Turned out that my wife gets uncomfortable after orgasm, and doesnt like being pounded, which is pretty much what I needed to orgasm myself. She also doesnt like cum, or have much interest in making me cum. In the end, we discovered information about Tantric, and incorporated that into our sex life. A few years later, that's exactly what our sex was. My enjoying the sex, but focusing on making her cum. Once she orgasmed, she would slide me out and my hard cock would hit the mattress. She was OK with me masturbating after, but after years of edging, and doing Tantric, where I had stopped associating sex with my own orgasm, I found it very hard to make myself orgasm. That led to her wanting me to stop masturbating. Now when I see some older porn, where the woman is still obviously aroused after the guy has cum, but gets nothing, I find myself realizing that I got exactly what I wished for way back when. Even now that I'm always locked during sex, and using toys or oral, I get a real excitement from knowing that she is about to cum, and I'm going to have to lie still, and let my erection subside on it's own afterwards.

[kpb57]

My first kinky feelings came at the age of 6 or 7, when I read a scene in one of Karl May's (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_May) western books where the protagonist was captured and bound by Indians.
Later on I had some friends (girls and boys) with whom I played bondage games in the summer, and experienced "peculiar feelings" during those games.
My first orgasm (that was not a nocturnal emission) came when I wrapped my dick in some rope and accidentally touched the glans.
It took me lots of years to realize that my affection for tying up or being tied up was perfectly OK and fun when played between loving partners, as has happened with my wife.

-K

[ChastityCrossdresser]

My earliest memory of wanting to wear women's clothes came when I watched my sister's ballet class when I was 6. I had no idea why, but I wanted to wear her tights and leotard. I was about 9 or 10 when I first put on one of her bras and the rest is history.

I'm also really into bondage and loved to see it in movies or tv when I was growing up. Again, I have no idea why I enjoyed seeing it, I just did. I had a (male) friend who liked to play cops and robber games and I played to lose when we were both around 10 or 11. He also seemed to enjoy tying me up as well and was very good with it. I would also get very excited during those games.

[chastehub]

I have no idea why I enjoyed seeing it, I just did.

i still cannot explain why the things that turn me on turn me on, i just know they have since before i knew what sexual arousal meant. i've come to realize my kinks are just part of who i am, and that has changed (for the better) a lot of my attitudes towards others and their sexual orientation / kinks. No more throwing rocks in this glass house.

[male_pet]

I had a similar experience in first grade playing "Houdini" and trying to escape from being tied up with string. It made me rock hard to get tied up. Then I started noting my reaction whenever characters were locked away in dungeons on various tv shows and movies. Eventually, I saw a Dominatrix on some Phil Donahue type interview show, and I had the aha! moment of realizing there was a whole underground of people who were into things like that.

It must be very different growing up today and to just have access to the entire fetish community being only a google search today.

With so many people saying that they realized that they had kinky buttons in early childhood, I have to wonder if the BDSM inclination is in some cases programmed genetically. Perhaps we are born kinky, and the various directions of our fetishes and roles are guided by our interests and life experiences.

MP

[Michele]

Sometimes I wonder about the psychology about it all... those who are into bondage, did they get over-punished as kids or not punished at all. As a matter of fact those who like/want/need to be punished or disciplined I'd it because as a young child btwn ages 1-5 they didn't get disciplined?

I could go on with questions about this forever lol but maybe I'll just write a blog post instead of going on for an hour here hmmm

**I know my need to control everything and especially sexual stuff definitely comes from what happened early in my childhood - very chaotic unstable household and the sexual part is from very early.... well in sure you get it.

[Tom Allen]

Sometimes I wonder about the psychology about it all... those who are into bondage, did they get over-punished as kids or not punished at all. As a matter of fact those who like/want/need to be punished or disciplined I'd it because as a young child btwn ages 1-5 they didn't get disciplined?

The idea that some kink stems from over or under compensation of some childhood episodes comes from both Freud and Kraft-Ebbing, but the links have never been proven to be causal. If this were the case, then you could expect every man who has (or hasn't) been spanked as a child to enjoy being spanked as an adult, but that's obviously not the case. Rather, it's more often that some people *look* for reasons to understand their kinks, and then link them to some episode(s) that they remember.

Personally, I have kinked toward bondage and bottoming for as long as I can remember - and I'm going back to childhood. Yes, I'm sure sci-fi novels, Batman/Catwoman comics, Japanese tentacle porn, and various other things contributed to it, but my guess is that they didn't cause my kinkiness.

[chastehub]

The idea that some kink stems from over or under compensation of some childhood episodes comes from both Freud and Kraft-Ebbing, but the links have never been proven to be causal.

Nature vs. Nurture. It sounds like Freud and Kraft-Ebbing were in the nurture camp. i did a little Googling to see if there is any consensus in the psychological community about nature vs. nurture when it comes to kinks, but i didn't find anything definitive. i did find, however, that as of March of this year us kinksters are no longer considered crazy by the psychological community, as long as we don't have hang ups about our kinks.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/artic ... happy.html

Personally i'm in the nature camp. The biggest reason i believe my kinks were already "hard-wired" at birth is the fact bondage would arouse me before i knew what sexual arousal was. When i was little, a naked girl / woman would not arouse me, but show me a picture of someone being tied up, handcuffed or chained to a dungeon wall and you could hammer nails with my junk. Further, i grew up in a very loving home and there are no incidents i can link my kinks to. Of course, if my kinks are tied to something that happened to me between ages 1-5 i wouldn't remember it, but i highly doubt that is the cause.