Denial amplifying fantasies.

[Critter228]

One thing I’ve noticed when being teased and denied often for days/weeks at a time, my fantasies go through the roof. I start wanting and sometimes craving things I know aren’t rational or probably wouldn’t enjoy if I wasn’t so damn horny.

Lately I’ve been feeling like I’d be okay with her sleeping with someone else as long as I was able to be there or watch or be Involved somehow. This is something I’ve been completely against for 40 years. Now it seems feasible.

Or wanting a three some. I’ve never been into it but now I fantasize about it all the time. Even if in the fantasy I’m caged or still denied. Or even forced to do something I’m not into. It’s more about the power exchange than the act itself I guess.

My question is, I’m sure others have felt this where hard limits become soft limits and soft limits become desirable, but has anyone acted on these horny fantasies? Did you regret it later after reality set in? I’m starting to think I should mention it to my gf but if she does want to push the boundaries of our sex life im also thinking maybe I shouldn’t cum? Maybe I need to stay in this headspace or I’ll lose interest and regret what we would do. Anybody have experience with this?

[Tom Allen]

if she does want to push the boundaries of our sex life im also thinking maybe I shouldn’t cum? Maybe I need to stay in this headspace or I’ll lose interest and regret what we would do.

I think most guys are familiar with the concept of things being really hot when you're horned up, but then seeming like a bad idea a minute after orgasm.

[TwistedMister]

One thing I’ve noticed when being teased and denied often for days/weeks at a time, my fantasies go through the roof. I start wanting and sometimes craving things I know aren’t rational or probably wouldn’t enjoy if I wasn’t so damn horny.

Lately I’ve been feeling like I’d be okay with her sleeping with someone else as long as I was able to be there or watch or be Involved somehow. This is something I’ve been completely against for 40 years. Now it seems feasible.

Or wanting a three some. I’ve never been into it but now I fantasize about it all the time. Even if in the fantasy I’m caged or still denied. Or even forced to do something I’m not into. It’s more about the power exchange than the act itself I guess.

My question is, I’m sure others have felt this where hard limits become soft limits and soft limits become desirable, but has anyone acted on these horny fantasies? Did you regret it later after reality set in? I’m starting to think I should mention it to my gf but if she does want to push the boundaries of our sex life im also thinking maybe I shouldn’t cum? Maybe I need to stay in this headspace or I’ll lose interest and regret what we would do. Anybody have experience with this?

I know EXACTLY what you mean. The hornier I get, the kinkier my thoughts become...and everything you've mentioned is part of them, especially the part about being compelled to do things that I would not ordinarily do and would not do 'willingly'.

...but has anyone acted on these horny fantasies?

Yes, some of my fantasies have come true, and it has been exciting/erotic as fuck. Part of my kink, is ensuring that I can't 'get out of it'- no safeword, but with certain 'hard limits' set beforehand, while other things that might be 'soft limits' for some are left open. I *really* get 'turned on' at the prospect of being compelled to do something I might not want to do at the time and to have no way to escape should it happen.

In some cases, you probably aren't going to want to be allowed to cum, at least not until the very end anyway...or maybe even not at all until some time afterward. Cumming too soon might 'spoil' the outcome and alter your perception of it. For me, there is one case where this is unavoidable, but it is part of the 'thrill'- I've written about this before so I'll try to keep it short here...Mrs. Twisted enjoys making me lick her pussy 'clean' after it's full of cum. She likes to sit on my cock and make me cum, then sit on my face. It's 'hot as hell' before I cum, but after I get my rocks off the idea is completely revolting and I don't want to do it...but, the thing is, and the thing that keeps it 'hot', is that I'm always restrained before I find out it's going to happen and she doesn't let me refuse. She makes me do it anyway, even though I don't like it and don't want to do it...which makes it 'hotter' for her...and 'hotter' for me later when I get horny again.

In fact, this kind of thing has turned out to be enough of a 'thrill' that earlier this year I gave her the 'green light' to put into action other fantasies that she has had, that coincide with some of mine, with very few limits.

[SteveOD]

Fantasy does not always work out in reality. However, I have been in a lot of threesomes because my wife is bi and had a steady girlfriend for 30 years. I have done all the fetishes you find on Fetlife. I tend to make my fetishes and fantasies come true. However, some work out well and others do not. Like when I watched my wife fuck my best friend. It did not arouse me in real life nor made me jealous. It was nothing like my fantasy or my wife's. My wife did not orgasm or come close to it. It sucked for both of us. We tried a few foursomes, but my wife did not like it and neither did I. Not like we expected. We did learn that she is not into guys sexually, not even me. We were always game to try any fetish. My limits are nothing that requires medical attention. I even fucked and been fucked by two gay friends just for the experience. I will try anything once.

If it is not harmful, try it. Worse that happens is that you do not like it and chalk it up to experience. I once thought a six some with 5 girls would be hot. Instead it was very annoying and distracting because they were all doing different things to me. Some causing pain, others given me pleasure to the point that I could not focus on anything. It was the first time I walked away from a group sex scene. Funny thing is that I always thought that chastity was stupid because all my fetishes were orgasm seeking, not avoiding. Then we tried it and it is much better than the fantasy. My wife no longer has to have sex with me several nights a week or deal with a penis which she does not find arousing. She gets to cum on her vibrator while I hold and kiss her though most times she hoods me and I can only listen. When my wife had a steady girlfriend, the girlfriend was into S&M and enjoyed hurting me sexually. She did it all and I trusted her with my life. Most things she did to me were great, some not so great even though her husband thought it was great.

Don't go into anything with expectations that it will pan out like your fantasy. In real life you cannot control all the people in it or feel pain or emotions. I approach new fetishes as a chance to experience a new sexual act. If I do not like it, at least I experience it. If I like it, we incorporate into our sex life. If you do not expect real life to be like your fantasy, odds are that you will like it since you did not expect it to be more than it was.

[Steve2059]

One thing I’ve noticed when being teased and denied often for days/weeks at a time, my fantasies go through the roof.

Pretty much why lots of us do it. For me, pre-chasity, "enforced" chastity was itself a fantasy so I suppose I'm living the dream. Over the last few years it's stopped being an occasional thing and, as She's come to enjoy it too for various reasons, it's turned into a lifestyle (though one we keep from friends).

One cautionary thing: My experience of fantasies is that once you've achieved one you don't rest on your laurels and thing Mission Accomplished, you find another fantasy. Because of this I do limit some of the things we do so they stay fresh. I don't want either to do myself harm, or have my predilections become widely-known (a fantasy I have is that I do tell everyone about my kinks and show them my locked cock etc. and they're all impressed. However I think the reality would not be like that, in which case the genie doesn't go back in the bottle).

[TwistedMister]

Two or three years ago, at a time when I was feeling particularly horny, Mrs. Twisted asked me what I wanted for my birthday. I took the opportunity to tell her that I didn't want her to 'buy' me anything, rather I would be interested in pursuing a scenario out of my fantasy library.

She was willing, so I wrote out a script/framework that outlined the scene. It wasn't a 'script' of the type where she would have to memorize and recite certain lines like a movie scene, but more of a general overview of first something like 'this' happens, then something like 'this', then something like 'this'.

Aside from from that, I left it mostly open as to specifics- how long, other things she might want to say or do, etc.. She was free to 'ad-lib' as much as she wanted and to add in any particular activities that she might desire for her own reasons. I expected that the whole thing would, at best, be probably a couple of hours from start to finish. The kicker was, that I had her promise that, once we started she would not stop until *she* was satisfied and decided that *she* wanted to stop, no matter if or how much I might seem to be unwilling to continue or even if I indicated that I wanted it to stop.

It was fantastic, the reality turned out to be even better than the fantasy. She really got into it and it lasted several times longer than I had thought it would, plus, she threw in some twists that were completely unscripted and unexpected. I was restrained pretty much throughout the whole thing so that I would not be able to prevent her from doing whatever she wanted, and it was amazingly thrilling and exciting to know that I had no control over the situation and that I was unable to escape until she was ready to let me loose.

It took my mind to a place it had never been before. At one point, I suddenly realized that she was doing/making me do something that I had never imagined her doing before, something that she had previously said she had no interest in (that type of thing) whatsoever, something that I find particularly humiliating and which there was only one way it could have been even more humiliating...it was completely unscripted, a surprise that she threw in on her own...I had previously thought that if anything like that was to occur, it would take a considerable amount of pain to force me to comply, but the most humiliating part of it was that I realized that I had not resisted in the slightest.

Overall, it was an incredible experience and I think it would be terribly exciting to see more of that repeated, as well as the other fantasies that have been building.

Hmmmmmm...my birthday is coming up again soon...

[cuyahoga]

I can assert that denial changes my desires, specifically with regard to pain. Without orgasm denial and/or chastity, I have no interest in ball pain play, or flogging/cropping. The longer I’m denied and/or caged, the more I crave it.

Same deal with playing with my butt, though that’s rarely fulfilled.