Look Forward to being Locked or Unlocked??

[wishful4]

Is there a point in our locked & chaste condition when we go from enjoying being locked to looking forward to being unlocked? I'm at about the 45 day point (but who's counting?)and have been unlocked for a day and a half at my KH/spouse's direction due to abrasion issues. Although it would not have upset me to remain locked, I have enjoyed my time out of the device even though no action occurred and I have a very small amount of dread going back in this evening because I know it's coming. This feeling puzzles me a bit because I love being locked by her and now that she is taking charge and taking responsibility for my chaste condition, I don't know why I would be feeling this way. Any one else have these feelings from time to time???

[velcrofist]

I love the irony of getting off at the idea of being denied, or whether it's more exciting to anticipate being denied or being allowed an orgasm. Without the anticipation (at least for me) it wouldn't be exciting so I'm in this weird headspace of wanting an orgasm because I can't have one, but if I got one I'll lose the excitement of the anticipation. To put it another way, if it was permanent denial it wouldn't be exciting at all for me but if/when I have an orgasm it ends the fun. It's a goddam treadmill!

[poor]

Chatelaine enjoys being unpredictable to the degree that I never know when I will be locked or orgasm. I know that I would be less satisfied with a month out of chastity than with (another) month without an orgasm.

[whistlersix]

I think my wife still doesn't understand that I like to be locked. She said on Friday that if I was good, she'd reward me. Bless her heart, she was really trying for me to play the part, however, I told her I didn't want to be unlocked (it had been a week for me since my last O and I was hitting that feel good plateau) . That caught her by surprise I think. It's a hard thing even to wrap my head around. I'm still not exactly sure what I want. While I want to get out and have her bring me to orgasm, I'm really enjoying what we have going on and don't want that dynamic to change. However, after the fact, I wish I'd have talked to her about letting me out and teasing me and then locking me back up. I'm not sure she's considered that as an option of 'reward'.

[usaabn]

Being a noob to the choice of being locked. I look forward to being locked and staying locked. This morning
before and after bathing, I could hear my bride rattling the keys. To be honest, I felt my penis growing in its
cage. I don't ask to be unlocked prior to bathing. I typically will stand near the bathroom and accept the outcome. The same after a bath I place the device on and stand quiet. The snap of the lock and her tug and smile puts everything into prospective.

[LockedUpNewb]

After almost a year of on and off chastity, I have discovered that I prefer being locked all the time. I like being released for play sessions. I love to have an orgasm. But I LOVE the teasing and denial more than the orgasm.

Orgasms last 4 or 5 seconds at most. You squirt - you get a body rush - it's over.

Tease and denial can last for WEEKS. The longest I have ever been denied an orgasm was 62 days. I was mad with lust and BEGGING for an orgasm. But when my wife finally granted the orgasm, I felt disappointed when it was finished. I can honestly say I'd have rather been teased mercilessly and locked up again without the orgasm.

It's a weird thing to wrap your head around. As men, we usually get what we want. Before chastity, orgasms had always been the ultimate goal. I never had sex with my wife without having an orgasm to finish. IMO it seams like most men are sort of 'wired' to cum and have the orgasm during intercourse or sexual activities.

Now we go from always being able to cum to NEVER or RARELY being allowed to cum.......... and for some reason, many of us not only like that....... it ends up being the only thing we crave. We end up craving the denial and the extended periods without the orgasm. Maybe other men don't experience it the same way as me?

I remember last summer we were playing a bead game where I had to draw a bead out of a bag daily. If I got the right color bead, I could have an orgasm. Well, it took me 43 days to get the right color. And my wife worked me over until I had the most explosive orgasm you can imagine. But about 15 secs before I came, I could feel it building and I started BEGGING her to stop and not let me cum. I didn't want to cum. It's over too quickly. Squirt... body rush.... done.... don't want to put the cage back on.... don't want to be submissive.... want to be free of the confines of the cage and fuck her..... want to be 'caveman' and TAKE it... take her... more cumming.....me tarzan ... me big strong guy......

To most men, the idea of going so long without an orgasm is NUTS. 45 days without an orgasm would be bad enough. But if you figure my wife teased and denied me about every 2nd or 3rd day during that whole time - I must have had 15 or 20 edging sessions. I was so friggin' horny..... my wife calls me a horny monkey on viagra ..... when I am that horny. I get CRAZED with lust and the desire to cum. But when the day finally came and I got my chance to orgasm, I could feel it building up and I actually begged her not to let me cum. It's so weird .... I'd rather be edged a dozen times over a 45-60 minute hand job session and then denied the orgasm.... and locked up again.

The anticipation of what she will demand of me... painting her toe nails or washing/waxing/detailing her car... cooking her favorite meal for her... I want to do all those things for her and my cock strains in the cage because I'm horny and it makes me even more horny to know that I'm serving her .. doing what she wants instead of masturbating or sitting on the couch being a lazy asshole. I anticipate the next game she will come up with or maybe the current game is still not done, so I anticipate the next roll of the dice or the next opportunity to pull a bead out of the bag.

I'm just much more content to remain locked and denied..... in service to my lovely wife. Orgasms are over-rated.

Weird huh?

[TwistedMister]

*I* don't think orgasms are 'over-rated', I enjoy them very much. I think I appreciate them more after a period of denial and anticipation. I see it as similar to something that I used to do when I was a kid- candy was a rarity, it was not kept in the house as a standard item. Basically, there were 3 times a year when we were allowed candy- Halloween, X-mas, and Easter. We would get a quantity and variety of candy and there would be no more until the next occasion.

In addition to rationing the amount I would eat so as to make it last longer, I would also save until last the pieces that I liked best, anticipating the pleasure I would receive from eating them when I finally got to them. It was an exercise in self-denial, somewhat masochistic (psychologically speaking), with the anticipation heightening the ultimate pleasure to come.

I see this as being very much similar- T&D being the lesser pleasures, heightening the anticipation and pleasure of the best bit (orgasm) to come in the future...except that the pleasure and anticipation of it is heightened further by the fact that it is not *self*-denial, the bestowing of the lesser and greater pleasures are dependent on the whims of another, which I find very erotic.

Experiencing a particular pleasure on a regular and frequent basis lessens the impact and enjoyment of it, it becomes routine and mundane, no longer a special 'treat' to be savored and treasured. This doesn't apply only to sex, but also to other pleasures in life. I sometimes think of [very] wealthy people (particularly those who are born into it) who, lacking restraint and [self] control become jaded and cannot seem to find 'happiness' in spite of the fact that they can have everything money can buy whenever they please...they do not realise that it is not 'in spite of' that, but *because* of it.

When not involved in the chastity 'game', I recognize this in myself. Horny? Too much 'trouble' to make nice with the wife? A few quick strokes and the problem is solved- mechanical and routine, on to the next thing. It is no longer a pleasure to be anticipated and savored, but something brief and fleeting, less of an enjoyment and more simply a means to an end. It also detracts from 'closeness' and can result in enmity and withdrawal, no effort is required, no need to work out problems or see to *her* happiness. If she is being 'bitchy' about something I can just ignore it and wash those troubles down the drain (what was that product?). Emotional separation grows and this is where many couples run into trouble- rather than go to the effort of working out problems they simply begin to ignore each other's needs...and if they don't find a way to fix it they end up divorced or enduring a 'loveless' marriage, perhaps even leading to infidelity (and divorce if they get caught). They forget why they got together in the first place, they wonder "What am I doing here?"

While I can recognize this in purely objective observation and analysis, when it is occurring the reasons for it are less visible due to a lack of seeing beyond the immediate problem. Introducing 'chastity' and handing over 'control' re-introduces the 'chase phase' of a romantic relationship. Remember when you were first courting/dating? The uncertainty? The anticipation of pleasure? The desire to go to great lengths to make her happy and reap the ultimate reward? The 'chastity game' re-establishes the pleasures of the 'chase' for both (as long as both are *involved*), closeness becomes more desirable and focus is renewed, 'reward' is more uncertain and more enjoyable because of it.

Chastity is not a solution to the problem, but a tool used to arrive at the solution, if used correctly and you *want* to re-ignite the passions that you once had (or extend them, if they have not yet been lost). It isn't going to work if there is nothing left to work *with*.

I look forward to both being locked, and being *unlocked*, not merely for the 'fleeting' reward of orgasm, but because throughout we are both involved with the other, it is something we do together and helps us to be more focused on each other.

It's also very erotic and a hell of a lot of fun.

[kpb57]

TwistedMister,

I can find us (as a couple) very well in what you write, in the state that we were in before chastity and in the state we are in now, as well.

K

[Atone]

*I* don't think orgasms are 'over-rated', I enjoy them very much.

I'm glad you wrote this, I was thinking the same thing.

-A

[cb6000s]

[quote="LockedUpNewb"Orgasms last 4 or 5 seconds at most. You squirt - you get a body rush - it's over.
[/quote]

That was true before chastity but not true today. I was unlocked after 48 days today and my orgasm was over 1 minute long and the most intense I have ever had. In fact, every one of my orgasms is the best one that I have ever had before. I'm not sure that 60 days will be be an increase over 48 days but I'm sure I'm going to find out.