[locknload] The courage to click the lock

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Well I survived her week-long trip. I did get overly-horny and send her a detailed message about the state of desire I had gotten into during her absence and asking to be returned to long-term chastity. I had been cumming twice a week with her lately. When she returned this weekend I think she really wanted to get fucked by me, and she let me cum. We will see if she returns me to waiting 2-3 weeks as she did before. She has been under a lot of pressure at work and we have been doing a renovation at home, so her capacity for making decisions is basically tapped. My energy is largely absorbed for the same reasons. But my desire to get more fully charged up has returned. I have returned to wearing my CD more often than not (not always comfortable, given the heat of summer) and in time our focus can return to our sex lives. Which is more to her climax life and less to mine.

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For the record, I welcome and enjoy comments on my "journey" here. They give me a sense of direction and give me a point of departure outside of my own little headspace.

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Yes, that would be thrilling and then terrifying!

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Even though it's always me doing it to myself, there is always a thrill about clicking the lock shut and pulling out the key, if the swelling reaction of the cock is a fair judge. As long as the weather is warm, I ride my bicycle at least a couple times a week, and can't quite manage how to surrender the keys. I tried pedaling around the neighborhood, and the discomfort is just tolerable. But the thought of 1-2 hours leaves me with visions of bleeding chafe- and pinch-wounds. I could tolerate being seen with a huge bulge, but the comfort issue dictates that I have a key handy for riding. I still long to give up control of all access, but that is difficult to envision.

I have continued acquiring Chinese imitation devices for the sake of trial. I like 2 models of the 6 I've tried: the A080 (Jailbird knockoff) and a Looker 02 knockoff. The A080 gets on my nerves a bit, with penis flesh offering itself through its bars to the inside of my jeans to be pinched at awkward moments. It is definitely the cleanest device, though. I think a larger inside diameter might help the pinching issue. I also still have issues with sometimes being so short when flaccid that my penis head catches the inside of the cage and points up. This results in occasional pinches and misdirected urine when I fail to get lined up before letting go.

The Looker 02 imitation has been getting more dick time of late. The end is enclosed, and the insert keeps the penis lined up, working together to prevent and penis pinches. I still get the occasional scrotum pinch, but this may be inherent to any trapped-ball device. I have slowly been increasing my time in this device, up to 36 hours now, to make sure all is well with having a tube down the dick. I can feel it moving up and down inside as I move,around, but the irritation is minor, and actually a good reminder. The ball at the end of the insert is about the maximum I could take at 10mm. I get an internal pinching feeling with nocturnal erections clamp down on the ball, but it's bearable and I feel better about a ball there rather than a sharp tube end. Urination is still something I'm getting used to with this device. You have to hold back the pressure when you pee, not always easy if the urge is strong, or the urine will go in different directions. It often goes outside the tube, which is a good thing for keeping your urethra lining moist, but the excess can hit the inside if the cage end and back spray, like running water into a spoon. The result can be pee going straight up out of the toilet. And don't even think about peeing while standing up; this random spray can very well end up down the front of your pants. And, there is no way to clear the inside of the tube when peeing; water tension will keep a column of urine inside, which slowly (or quickly) releases its contents onto your pants within minutes. It's amazing how much volume the tube can hold. Still, I like the feel of being locked into this device. If there was some way to cap the hole after peeing it would be much better to me.

The next step is a couple of fully-enclosed steel tubes I have just bought. The thought of having the dick inside a tube which doesn't allow me to see, let alone touch, the cock, is deeply stimulating mentally. At least in concept... I'm not sure how I would handle that mentally. The down side will be hygiene; the inside of the tube will no doubt be doused in urine, and demand cleaning at least twice a day to prevent odor buildup. I doubt my keyholder will find this aspect appealing. But perhaps I can shake it clean better than a cage with a urethral insert. And there will definitely be fewer pinching issues!

I'll keep you all posted on my trial phase. Once I feel comfortable trying the different styles, I'll order a custom-made, real stainless steel device. Of course, I will have spent about half the cost of a real device on these Chinese imitations, but I feel this is a good test of what really works for me.

Please feel free to comment or ask questions of me.

[TwistedMister]

...there is no way to clear the inside of the tube when peeing; water tension will keep a column of urine inside, which slowly (or quickly) releases its contents onto your pants within minutes. It's amazing how much volume the tube can hold. Still, I like the feel of being locked into this device. If there was some way to cap the hole after peeing it would be much better to me.

You'll probably just have to make do with a woman's panty liner. Your KH might even find that amusing (Mrs. Twisted used to complain about having to wear a 'diaper' several days out of the month).

[kpb57]

I own and use the original Looker.
I also have the problem with urine dripping out afte leaving the toilet. I solve this by folding up 2 sheets of toilet paper into a rather thick package and putting that package into my underwear to soak up any drops. Works well.
An option would be to use the plug screw that steelworxx provides with the Looker, but I don't want to have to fiddle around before using the toilet. I only use that when I go swimming with the device.
For someone who is uncut, the cap of the Looker is essential for comfortable wear without pinching; the anatomic basering provides additional comfort for the scrotum.
My longest time of continuous wear was 3 days.

-K

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I have been alternating between the Looker02 clone and the JB clone at night the last few weeks. I find advantages and disadvantages with each. The L02 is enclosed at the end and is shorter, which means I can wear it under my jeans without uncomfortable pinching. But when I pee I still have dripping issues, which means all-day wear is questionable. Pads and tissue wads just don't seem to be a good solution since I am fairly active at work. The JB clone seems a better long-term wear choice, though I get the occasional pinch. I can stand up peeing if I take time to line the dick up in the cage, an option not at all available in the L02 clone. And given that some of my restroom breaks are in port-a-potties, sitting down to pee is not at all desirable. And cleanliness is also an issue with the L02 - closed-end devices get smelly without 2 or 3 daily cleanings, which is not an option for me at work. While I love the feel of the urethral insert, I am wearing the JB clone more often now. I am expecting to get a fully – enclosed device in the mail soon, which should prove to be an interesting experience. I suspect the cleanliness issue will prevent me wearing this long term. But the thought of having absolutely no contact with the penis is very intriguing.

We are going on vacation in about 2 weeks. I ejaculated Sunday with my KH, and have asked her to keep me in chastity (locked in or not, always on the honor system) from that time until we leave. That should make vacation very exciting! She has never kept me more than 20 days, and the beginning of vacation would be about day 18 for me. From past experience, I know I will be very horny by then. During sex play, we often talk about her fucking another guy while I watch, locked up. Perhaps we will find a guy on vacation to fulfill this fantasy. I am definitely wary of getting what I asked for.

I am extending the periods of time I am locked in advice as I get used to having it on during my varied days. Do my work involves a good deal of walking, I have found that I can stay locked up during work hours without too many difficulties, as long as I am wearing the JB clone. My biggest obstacle to wearing a device full-time during the warmer season is the fact that I ride my bike twice a week. I have only toyed with wearing a device while I ride, but I cannot envision an hour and a half on a bike saddle with a device on. Perhaps if I invested in a Mature Metal JB I would feel differently. A custom fit would probably come closer to making bicycling in a device possible. The $400 price tag makes that option hard to swallow.

All told, I feel like I am moving farther down the road to total chastity. I have learned much about what feels right and how I am able to stay locked in a device in various circumstances. My keyholder has one of my two keys hidden, but I continue to hold on to the other as I experiment in fit and comfort. I long for the day when I hand over both keys and walk away from all control of the penis.

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My KH and I are going on vacation to a large American city in about a week. Since my earlier postings in this thread on the subject of cuckolding, the subject has continued evolving in our fantasy life. As a reminder, I brought the subject of watching her fuck another man while I was locked up and she locked in on the idea. That was a few months ago. Many times during teasing she has brought this fantasy up, and the idea has developed to the point that we are going to walk down playing at the cuckold game while on vacation.

The idea is for us to separately enter a bar, and sit at some distance apart. She is going to wear the crotchless panties and low-cut, nipple-exposing bra that I bought her as underwear, with some enticing clothes over them. I will watch while guys flirt with her, and will be caged, with the key on a chain visibly hanging around her neck. If a guy should inquire about sex, she will explain the key and that her locked boyfriend would be watching. I suspect many guys would be put off by that, but we will be looking for the odd guy who finds that a turn-on. Most guys wouldn't be observant enough to notice, but inquiries about the key around her neck would prompt a discussion about chastity. If the flirter wants to be her bull, she would tell him I'm watching, give me the sign, and we'd proceed to our motel room. I would remain locked and watch him fuck her. She would be wet already, since I would warm her up before going to the bar, and the idea apparently excites her, since she keeps bringing it up. Though we never use them, we have purchased condoms for her bull. I would love to see his cum dripping from her well-fucked pussy, but not from a bar pick-up. I do not plan to participate beyond actively watching and giving verbal comment.

If this scenario goes well, we would pursue finding a bull at home. If we got to know and trust him, the condom could come off and he could get control of my key.

In reality, I think she will flirt with a couple of suitors, neither of which will be suitable to her (we will agree on a "save me" signal), and we'll return nightly to our room just the two of us for some teasing for me and some cumming for her. But it will be hot going through the motions.

[catkar]

Have you considered a Prince Albert piercing. This greatly simplifies things, or at least it did for me. It's easy to make it very secure, and you can even skip the whole ball entrapment thing and go with something like a PA-5000, or the DIY I describe in another posting. I can see you possibly finding a very comfortable ride on your bike with either device, since it lets your cock fall to either side, out of the way. I haven't tried it with a bike, so I can't say for sure...

Good luck with the cuckolding experience! It's fun to watch you on your journey of exploration, and I wish the best for you..... My wife's bull definitely brought a whole new, welcome dimension to our relationship!

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When riding my road bicycle there is no room on or on either side of the saddle. I still need to test-ride short distances in my device, but the saddle puts pressure on the perineum, about where the base ring of any ball capture device rests. It seems to me that that would cause unhealthy pressure or chafing, but one never knows until one tries.

As to a PA, I have always wanted one, but do not relish the thought of trying something I could not reverse if I didn't like it. In other words, I don't fancy permanently marring myself, especially something my KH and I value highly! I also have read that peeing can be messy, with the extra hole, and I don't want to sit to pee the rest of my life. All the same, the idea is very intriguing. But my KH told me I am responsible for all dental expenses...